How many partners have you had sex with? Some can confidently say “none.” Others may have to use fingers and toes to get the exact number. Wherever you are in your journey of life and sexual exploration, there is no need to feel guilty about the number of partners you have or have not had. This post is to inform you, however, that multiple partners is definitely not a wise choice scientifically speaking.
If you have had multiple partners, have you ever asked yourself why? Honestly, ask yourself “why?” Could it be perhaps that you were lonely and wanted someone to connect with you on a deeper level? It is usually during times of loneliness that one is more likely to reach out and seek love or a relationship by sleeping around with one or maybe even multiple partners. These liaisons may be “serious” or they may be “casual.” Either way, to avoid being lonely, some believe sleeping around is the only way to fill that void. On the surface it may seem that sleeping around will bring fulfillment, but psychological scientific studies are showing a different result.
A group of researchers dissected a study that was completed by researchers in New Zealand to discover a correlation between drug and alcohol abuse, mental illness, and multiple sex partners. The research provided was from a longitudinal study. A longitudinal study checks in regularly on what/who the researchers are studying. In this study, researchers followed a cohort of participants born between 1972-1973. “The relationship between numbers of sex partners over three age periods (18-20, 21-25, and 26-32) and diagnoses of anxiety, depression, and substance dependence disorder at 21, 26, and 32 years were examined.”
There is a tremendous amount of significant findings in this study. One of the findings was that “increasing numbers of sex partners were associated with increasing risk of substance dependence disorder at all three ages.” After the longitudinal study, and the team calculating the number of sex partners each participant had over the years, they were “able to calculate the odds of a participant developing a psychological disorder.” The researchers concluded that for both the men and women participants who had multiple partners had greater odds of developing substance dependence. Perhaps even more interesting was that for women, the study reflected that they have more of a propensity to substance abuse when they have slept with multiple partners. “For women, there were statistically significant associations between numbers of sexual partners and substance dependence disorder at all age periods and the odds ratio increased with increasing numbers of partners.”
This study showed that there is a significant connection between multiple sexual partners and substance abuse i.e. alcohol, drugs, etc. Why is this? Let me highlight some possibilities. First, young adults are generally wired for risk-taking behavior so drugs and sex would be a byproduct of that behavior. Second, young adults are generally not married and are often found in the same area, i.e. bars. The last possibility I would like to highlight is that having multiple partners puts one at risk. If one has multiple partners, chances are there is no depth to those relationships. It may also be that with multiple sexual partners means multiple relationship failures and that creates anxiety and depression in one’s psyche. “Specifically, feelings of loneliness and hopelessness are related to substance use and drinking alcohol to cope with negative emotions has been shown to result in alcohol problems.”
The concern with psychologists is that multiple sex partners can lead to substance abuse (an even higher possibility statistically speaking for women to struggle with it),
Dr. Susan Krauss in an article in Psychology Today observed, “The point of this study was “to point out that, from a strictly scientific standpoint, engaging in frequent sex with multiple partners does seem to carry a risk.”
Thoughts? Feedback?
29 Comments on “How Many Sexual Partners Have You Had?”
I think that substance abuse being related to the actual sex is unrealistic; the risk for women is the emotional attachment. We become attached and therefore we are depressed when attachments are not reciprocated.
Added to this is the fact that people are seriously concerned with how many sexual partners a woman has had. Everyone says it doesn’t matter, and that we don’t need to worry; if we don’t need to worry, then why is everyone still talking about it?
Why are women still being called whores, sluts, and cunts because they admit to liking sex?
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make this a rant. My actual point is simple: I believe that substance is far more related to others reactions to sex with multiple partners, than to the sex itself.
Of course, I could be completely wrong.
I appreciate your candidness. I agree with you about the attachment. I think I will post soon about that…maybe next. I was focusing on this particular study–and that study discovered that multiple partners and substance abuse were more of an issue than anything else.
And that’s totally fair; I just think that it’s more the affects of having too many partners than the actual act that creates more issues. And the only study I’ve done is on my own life and that of my friends. I appreciate your post!
I agree with you. People use substances for all kinds of reasons. They are medicating away some kind of pain, be it loneliness, depression, anger, etc. I am a recovering addict, and never in the course of my active addiction did I pop a pill or take a drink because of sex itself. Not one time.
As for the shaming of women who admit to liking sex…I wish I could see that trend changing, but I don’t, particularly with the conservative religious factions of culture trying to take a stronger hold on the conversation regarding any kind of sex. Slut-shaming is a big thing in the church as a whole.
Thank you for your reply! I am def trying to take a different approach to waiting then has been done in the past. I think there has been a lot of hurt and shame cast by people with good intentions. In fact I probably have been guilty of they at one time.
I was really amazed at the original study. And I appreciate your openness about your honesty about your addiction in the past and the fact you did mention you never took a pill or tasted a drink because of sex itself. It appears there was some deeper hurt going on and those two just naturally went together. Did I understand your thought properly? Thank you for your honesty and for sharing!
I think you are confusing correlation with causation; it seems just as likely that mental health issues or substance abuse cause someone to seek out multiple sex partners. It seems you are implying that multiple sex partner causes drug abuse and mental health problems but that it quite the causal leap, and additional studies would need to be done to discover what the causal relationship is between these factors.
Thank you for reading and your insightful comment. If I came across as if I was stating that the study found multiple partners absolutely leads to substance abuse, I must not have written it clearly.
I did not tend to communicate nor did the original study indicate anything about a “causation.” Here’s what I quoted: “For women, there were statistically significant associations between numbers of sexual partners and substance dependence disorder at all age periods and the odds ratio increased with increasing numbers of partners.”
What I was attempting to communicate is that these two variables occur together, but I may have let my biases into the interpretation of data. It is like which came first “the chicken or the egg?” This study just explains that the chicken and the egg happen together. (Like any analogy, this one will break down after awhile)
Thanks for the comment. It seems you may have a background in psychology and I appreciate your feedback. Your reply has encouraged me to take a closer look at my post and make sure I am not suggesting “causation” when in fact it is “correlation.” This week I’ll connect with my psychologist friend, PhD Candidate (psychology), and chat more in this interesting and complicated field of statistics and psychology.
I’ve nominated you for an “Inner Peace” award for sharing so openly on a very important subject. You can choose to accept or not (I will not be offended!) But at the very least I wanted to post a link to your page through one of my posts and spread the word on your blog. And thanks for swinging by with all the comments. Keep up the great writing. http://simplyenjoy.wordpress.com/
Thank you for that. I will graciously accept that award!
This is am amazing post and I not only appreciate the blog and your posting the study but the other comments your thoughts brought forth. I’m considerably older than other commenters [approaching the afternoon of my life] and based on my own life, reading and studying more psychology books than I care to remember or cart out of my own library and eventually going after that advanced degree – my own conclusion is that an addictive personality will manifest itself in many forms. When one addiction is clean (i.e. binge eating is under control and an individual feels good about themselves for the first time in their lives and suddenly they are getting attention they’ve never had before, often they don’t know what to do with it and it can easily lead to a sexual liaison without a foundation for a relationship). Having a wonderful new body can just as well lead to a shopping addiction for all those wonderful fashions a woman or man has been unable to wear before. I watched myself turn to an exercise addiction after taking off 150 pounds until I finally realized the compulsive exercise and rigid digit would kill me as surely as the over-eating. Sex can be used the same as any other substance to make an individual feel good – no matter how fleeting the moment.
You hit the nail on the head, I think. I couldn’t have said it better – addiction is addiction. Sex happens to activate the same parts of the brain as the use of certain drugs. Chemicals like dopamine are powerful and people who have a predisposition for addiction (going off of the diathesis-stress model) tend to go down multiple paths to fulfill their needs and get the same “high,” whether it is from sex, drugs, exercise, etc.
That is why it is important in addiction counseling (or any counseling really where a person is relying on something to fulfill a need) that one not only take away the substance or act that is unhealthy but that the hole created gets filled with something that is healthy. In psychotherapy, I would want to see what was in the hole and then work on mending that.
But in the end, addiction is addiction. Different substances and acts, similar reactions in the brain. It is not a huge surprise that people who abuse substances also tend to have more sexual partners. It is a correlational relationship that makes sense.
Well said.
Thanks for all the insightful comments!
Hey!!
I am writing a research paper on the effects of multiple sexual partners on today’s society, could you possible site your sources that I may also use them in my paper?
Thanks!
Awesome! The sources should be highlighted with a hyperlink. When I get hm, I will dbl check that.
Just click on the hyperlinks; they are working fine and will take you directly to sources.
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Correlation does not prove cause.
I think it is much more likely that the correlation we see is due to the fact that many, (though not all), people (especially women), that are “promiscuous” have emotional/mental difficulties that cause them to seek out comfort in self-destructive behaviors.
Having multiple partners is not a problem, as long as one is safe and doing so with the right mindset.
But for some having multiple partners can be a sign that there are deeper issues, which may also mean substance abuse, psychological distress, etc.
Devon, thanks got your thoughtful post. I agree correlation does not equate to cause. There are many factors.
You also wrote that, “Having multiple partners is not a problem, as long as one is safe and doing so with the right mindset.” What do you mean by “not a problem” and “the right mindset”?
Sex is so much more than the physical and when we treat it as only that, we step onto dangerous grounds.
I look forward to your response.
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